Category Archives: Uncategorized

BATTLE AX, VIRGINIA (Rooters agency) – A new federal holiday was today proposed for the United States. Under the tentative title of National Quickshot Day, the holiday would “celebrate guns of all kinds, but especially those carried by civilians,” explained … Continue reading →

(Rooters agency) When the Ukrainian government announced its proposal for an international poll on social media site Twistr, it presumably thought the outcome was a foregone conclusion. As is now well known, the Ukrainians took considerable umbrage at the proposal … Continue reading →

Takeover offer raises questions NEW YORK (Rooters agency) – Wall Street, and exchanges around the world, were thrown into turmoil by what is undoubtedly the most unusual takeover bid in the history of takeover bids since the Serpent bought Eden … Continue reading →

WASHINGTON (Rooters agency) – Analysts here are uncertain of the longer term implications of today’s agreement on the Inaction Reduction Act. It is hoped that the agreement, between Acting President Joblot Munchkin and his own Demonstrative Party after months of … Continue reading →

WASHINGTON, 15 February 2026 (Rooters agency) – As expected, America’s highest judicial institution, the Supine Corpse, today overruled a state murder law. The decision, which is expected to impact laws in most or all of the country’s states, had been … Continue reading →

WASHINGTON (Rooters agency) – The United States’ leading advocate of gun rights has proposed what it calls “a sensible way to reduce mass shootings in our country.” Barry Bogus III, president of the National Weapons Association, outlined the idea to … Continue reading →

NEW YORK (Rooters agency) – There has been widespread, mostly hostile, reaction in the US and Europe to the decision of Muckburgers to end its operations in Russia. Supporters of Ukraine against the invasion launched by Russian President Vladitude Buttinsky … Continue reading →

NEW YORK (Rooters agency) – Massive falls occurred across all US stock exchanges today. Exchanges across the world in turn reacted with sharp contractions in some stocks but also abrupt rises for others that are seen as competitors of US … Continue reading →

Afternoon naps in the conservatives’ chambers were suddenly interrupted by Sammy Altarboy. “Hey, guys, I’ve just been skimming the Constitution, and guess what.” Brash Cattlecar looked up from his laptop, after carefully closing the lid. “It doesn’t mention abortion. You … Continue reading →

(As has been reported, the Russian government has banned use of the term “war” to describe its conflict with Ukraine. Although there are no reliable reports of this edict being further extended, there are clearly many Russians aware of a … Continue reading →